Allan Ivarsson Author... of Books


Love & Separation


One of the mistakes society too often makes is to think that men and women are vastly different in caring feelings. Both sexes fall in love and when they break up, often experience hurt and stress. Whether the walk away breakup, is launched by the male or female, the other sex partner feels hurt.

Romance breakups is not just a female thing, or a male thing. Men can cry just like women, except that they are less likely to be open about the fact that they cried.

Relationships are not easy for any person, even successful happy marriages experience moments of disagreement and conflict throughout their life. We are human beings, not perfect creatures.

One thing is always true… we either click together as a friendship team or we don’t. We may have enjoyed good times together, but that does not mean we are right for each other forever.

We must simply appreciate the past good times and be thankful for those good experiences. And when time reflects it is time to let go, so we must.

Chemistry is important both physically and in ideas and beliefs, but alone it is not enough, it also needs soulmate compatibility and that is the key which is not easy to find. For that reason, living alone or in a relationship, stay open in mind, calm in spirit, loyal in friendship, caring in nice thinking and behaviour and very important, always live with a ‘Positive Mental Attitude’… there is no place for depression, negativity, drugs, excessive alcohol or gambling in a happy life. And it is very unwise to smoke.

Quality of life improves when spending is not wasted on bad habit negativity.

The tragedy of life is not in breaking up. The real tragedy is when couples are vindictive towards each other during separation process. Always be nice even when hurt exists during parting of company.

Marriage breakup in old age after many years of marriage is very unwise. Couples should know whether they are compatible with each other during the first seven years together.

Young persons do not truly know themselves until they reach the age of 33 years to 35 years. We are all on a steep learning curve about who we are until the age of 35 years old. If a person does not know who they are in character and belief system by the time they are 40 years old, sadly they probably will never come to understand their own reality. But there are always exceptions to every guidance rule.

We will not be successful in a relationship, until we understand ourselves. There is no room for greed, vanity and selfishness in a good partnership. Strength, Honour and Chivalry is not only important in society, but is also very important in a good happy friendship.

When we break up in a relationship be it in marriage or just a boy/girl romance, or a boy/boy romance or a girl/girl romance, the bottom line is the same, we must let go peacefully, even when feeling sadness, loneliness and hurt, we must simply focus calmly on a new direction.

Good friendship relationships are not just about love, looking at each other, it is about looking in the same direction together for life. Each person needs space and may even enjoy different hobbies and interests, which they share with each other in communication. It is the friendship that strengthens a relationship, passion will not last if true friendship is not looking in the same direction together.

When it is sadly time to part, let go with grace, and always live life calmly, being nice.

Allan Peter Ivarsson © 2018

Poster - You Are Not Alone Whilst You Love 1980 by Allan Ivarsson



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