Emotional Intelligence

This ‘Emotional Intelligence’ online presentation was Published in 2018 Paperback book COMPENDIUM II printed in colour on quality paper, by BLUE LIGHT PUBLICATIONS. It is also available in Electronic Kindle book. amazon.com

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Emotional Intelligence

(2008)

(Revision 1:2014)

By Author

A person with average IQ, who possesses emotional intelligence and excellent communication skills, can beat a person with high IQ who does not have emotional intelligence, in the management art of achieving happiness and success. Whilst some people instinctively have a natural inclination towards the development of emotional intelligence, the reality is true; EI is learned and can be taught.

E.I. is not a psychology process, it is simply a philosophy, a state of mind living with inner peace in harmony with open mind and the eternal quest for truth.

E.I. uses the KISS method.

The idea of ‘Anger Management,’ is a small part of E.I. and when a person learns emotional intelligence, anger management is no longer required. A person with EI is by self-trained nature a calm person with a good sense of inner peace and pragmatic thought. Even people who believe in fixed dogma systems may achieve some level of EI however, they will never know higher truth until they live with open mind. The problem with fixed dogma belief systems is that when challenged, the believers too often take offence, dump E.I. and launch attack mode. E.I. only exists within them, when every person collectively around them, agrees with their fixed dogma belief system. Religious systems have too often throughout history, proven that this observation is true. Religious people are only truly happy, when they are all a collective part of the ‘Mutual Admiration Society’…when they face rejection of their belief ideas, they are easily offended, and too often spit the dummy. That reality, I have witnessed many times with dogmatic Christians accusing someone of being ‘Offensive and Blasphemous’ and I have observed that ‘True Muslims’ are even more aggressive, and even more easily offended. And I know that Ultra-Orthodox Jews are also easily offended. Which ‘Belief System’ is right? Which one is wrong? My answer is simple, all are wrong.

The learning of ‘Calm Thinking’ starts out as an auto-suggestive conscious effort, evolving into a habit, finally becoming instinct. The way of Calm thinking and behaviour comes through ‘Spiritual Inner Peace’ the way of living naturally as the ‘Eye of Calm in a Storm’.

I have faced death several times during my adult life and survived situations, in which others have been killed, simply because I did not panic and remained like an ‘Australian Monitor Lizard’ calm and alert. This does not mean that E.I. will always save us, but it does mean that our opportunity to survive improves, when we remain calm with confident conviction.

People with EI can also develop reasonably good communication skills, in reading, writing, speaking and accurate spelling. A person cannot achieve emotional intelligence without reasonable communication skills. To learn the way of calm thinking one must also learn to communicate. Highly explosive emotional people are weak in communication. Their abusive violent emotional tendency is linked to their laziness towards learning the art of good communication.

People who swear profusely using foul coarse language are boring in communication. A person who constantly uses the same words repeatedly, like swearing does not have good communication skills, and hence, has not yet learnt emotional intelligence. Their life will always trend towards conflict and misery. Life is hard enough, as it is, without being handicapped by lazy communication. True happiness and success starts with good communication skills. Sadly, lazy thinkers will not understand what they are losing. Lazy people who refuse to constantly learn do not have reliable emotional intelligence. Frustration, Depression, Hate, Anger and Vanity are all negative attitude enemies of E.I. Anyone is capable of learning EI, but first they must make a persistent determined effort. They must always strive to upgrade their communication skills. The natural ability of anger management, the way of inner peace, calm feeling starts with good communication.

Like everything in life that is good, there is a negative side to ‘Emotional Intelligence’. There are people that misuse E.I. for manipulative benefit. In other words, ‘Greed Entrepreneurs’ and tyrants will use E.I. to incite the emotions of naïve gullible people. This does not mean that we should not learn ‘Emotional Intelligence’ which is a wholesome dimension of wellbeing. But, ‘E.I.’ needs a companion and that companion is objective open-minded pragmatic thinking that uses common-sense logic and does not naively just believe what someone says in speech or writing.

First rule of learning for all information…check thy understanding, check the ideas, don’t blindly believe, always scrutinize ideas; for every question, there is an answer and for every answer there is a question…that is how we learn and progress.

A well-informed person looking at the total picture, all points of view, has a far better opportunity of making more accurate right decisions, than a person whom just blindly believes what they are fed. I would be flabbergasted if readers just blindly believe what I said, in fact I would feel horrified- I would expect them to think outside the square and take my thoughts and put them under the microscope and adopt them only when they feel confident in the concepts. However, to successfully analyze truth it does require ‘Emotional Intelligence’, an emotional person will not use logic pragmatically all the time. Uncontrolled emotions do trend towards lack of pragmatic logic in decision making process and subsequent actions. Being the eye of calm in a storm is the only right way to live. Without E.I., we as individuals are indeed handicapped.

‘Emotional Intelligence’ is not about the ability to read other people’s emotions and body language expressions. E.I. is about inner emotional calm backed by a ‘Can Do’ Positive Mental Attitude that thinks and acts pragmatically, with persistent commitment, backed by willpower to always get it right; all this energy and effort to ensure success, does need to be well informed in knowledge and understanding, even an emotionally intelligent person cannot succeed, if they are not well informed in balanced wholesome good knowledge and skills.

Understanding human nature, learning men and women and children, and knowing how to read other people’s emotions and body language is a valuable skill, which is not necessarily always reliably accurate. However, whilst mastering such skill does require E.I. the gaining of inner peace, the way of ‘Emotional Intelligence’, does not require a knowledge/skill on how to read other people’s emotions. Those persons that believe they are skilled in reading human nature, should not get vainly overconfident, beware of the ‘Poker Face’.

‘Emotional Intelligence’ is not a process of always being useful; it is not about switching it on and off like an electric light; E.I. is a state of constant being, a living sense of inner calm and peace, even when facing danger and being under pressure in a very demanding must be successful job. Good project management of any kind, be it shaping or maintaining, needs E.I. to achieve best results.

When hiring employees, don’t hire them by analysing if they have E.I. or not- such review is not necessary. Employ people based upon their skills and attitude to match a job requirement. Employment is like marriage ‘Emotional Intelligence’ is not mandatory, it is simply a personal asset that gives the individual a better opportunity to enjoy success and happiness.

One of the dumbest things CEO’s and ‘Business Managers’ and Psychologists can do is trying to measure a person’s ‘Emotional Intelligence’ by reviewing and testing a person for E.I. In fact, as an employee, I would reject and refuse to undergo such naïve intellectually backward false knowledge tests, invented by vain individuals that overrate their ability to understand what makes good people successful at what they do.

Psychology has a constant negative habit of creating countless volumes of false knowledge to justify its own self-importance existence, which is unproductive homework that does not contribute anything wholesome to societal progress, other than creating expenditure that some foolish person pays for.

After reading ‘Blue Light’ A-Z works, Psychology by its nature will write more unproductive false knowledge trying to tear down ‘Blue Light’ credibility. How do I know this is true? The best way to explain it, is in that famous fable, I will table the story abridged… The Frog swimming across a raging river helped a Scorpion on its back to survive. In the middle of the river the scorpion stung the frog with a poisonous sting consequently they both died. Before disappearing below the surface, the frog asked the scorpion, “Why did you do that?” and the scorpion replied, “Because it’s in my nature.”

And that sums of Psychology…they can’t help themselves it is in their nature to create reams of false knowledge.

If you are thinking about creating better tests for emotional intelligence, forget it; all you will succeed in doing is creating volumes of unproductive false knowledge information. We have enough false knowledge in the world without creating more…don’t forget KISS.

Job performance is about knowledge, skills and dedicated commitment to deliver the best results in accordance with one’s own experience and natural ability. ‘Emotional Intelligence’ is not required to do a job; E.I. is simply a personal asset, not a job/marriage requirement.

Emotionally Intelligent people do have a higher sense of confidence in a positive way void of the vanity that overconfident people possess. The exception to this reality, is when devious people use E.I. to try and manipulate the uneducated and naïve. Vanity is easily offended, demonstrating lack of E.I.

‘Emotional Intelligence’ is like all good skills, it can be used for good or evil. Even Atheism and Religions like Judaism and Christianity can be used for good or evil. ‘Intelligence Quotient’ can be used for good or evil. But ‘Philosophical Intelligence’ has a zero tolerance for evil thought and action.

Allegations of ‘Apostasy, Blasphemy and Heresy’ is a consequence of feeling offended, which in turn is a consequence of vanity. When a person becomes offended, angry that someone rejects their beliefs that person demonstrates by their overreaction that they lack ‘Emotional Intelligence’.

Muhammad founder of Islam, did not have E.I., he often went into an emotional rage when people rejected his teachings. Hence, the very foundation character of Islam, the example copies of Muhammad character, the nature of its belief system, does not have true ‘Emotional Intelligence’.

It is not wisdom that is wrong, it is not the wholesome benefits that is wrong, it is the way it is used that is either right or wrong.

Water the precious foundation of carbon life, gives life, but it can also kill and used by evil is a dangerous weapon. Electricity, magnetism, gravity and nuclear power all give life benefits, but misused by evil they can kill.

The use of ‘Emotional Intelligence’ and ‘Philosophical Intelligence’ is like the use of water and fire, it should not be feared or rejected, it should simply be respected for what it is and used wisely as a tool to survival, an aid to wholesome wellbeing.

Children should be taught the brief overview ‘Cosmic Philosophy’ of ‘Emotional Intelligence’, but real exposure to living ‘Emotional Intelligence’ must come from the home, the living example of parents…Children learn what they live.

‘Emotional Intelligence’ is not a psychology, it is a ‘Cosmic Philosophy’ of calm confidence that the way of happiness begins by feeling inner peace backed by pragmatic ‘Positive Mental Attitude’.

The use of E.I. is not a tool for strategic timing of emotional expressions, it is as said earlier, a dimension of good wholesome feeling. The art of selling uses emotions, but more importantly knowledge and good communication skills, sells ideas, products and self. A salesperson does not need E.I. to become a great communicator.

As a young man in Sydney, early 1970’s, I was very successful as a door to door salesman, in ‘Sales by Objection’ and in my young years, I did not have ‘Emotional Intelligence’ –there was no inner peace within me, but I did have verbal communication skills in the art of persuasion, and I did know how to use ‘Positive Mental Attitude’ in sales delivery. This is no different to being, a good actor…positive and confident in delivery on stage, but not always so confident in personal life. I began teaching myself the art of persuasion at the age of fifteen years in street approaches to girls, by the age of twenty-two years I was a highly skilled professional, my verbal communication training began at the age of twelve years in ballroom dancing. I was thirty-five years of age in 1984, before I learned inner peace, emotional calm and gained ‘Emotional Intelligence’ twelve years before I heard of the coined name E.I. tabled by Daniel Goldman in 1996.

The learning of ‘Emotional Intelligence’ touted by many academic leaders, reminds me of Dale Carnegie’s ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’, which I studied in 1970 at the age of twenty-one years, it was also touted heavily in business circles; even my wife Jan a ‘Financial Accountant’ whom I met in 1987, was exposed to such training years before we met. The wiser use wisdom to add to their character and wholesome wellbeing. The unwise change their personality to become a living copy of the personality projections that lift off from the book of ideas.

Whilst wisdom and pragmatic facts may exist in knowledge, surrounded by reams of false knowledge tabled by Psychologists, Psychiatrists and so-called question mark ‘Social Scientists’ I am extremely careful about what I trust as being true. Far too much unproductive invented false knowledge information is tabled by these so-called experts. And I hate having to wade through the crap to get to the truth.

As I have said previously…one of the most idiotic scenarios is the living existent practice of ‘Muslim Psychologists’ and ‘Muslim Psychiatrists’ -a title awarded by degree qualifications to a ‘True Muslim’ believer in the Qur’an and Muhammad, is completely, stupid, in every which way. The ‘Belief System’ of Islam rejects exploration philosophy and psychology, because to be true in acceptance of open mind ideas, a person must reject fixed dogma belief systems. A ‘True Muslim’ will never reject the anti-assimilation, anti-freedom apartheid, jihad dictatorship hate speech in the Qur’an, and thus automatically will never ever be a true good philosopher, or good psychologist, in the open-minded essential essence of research and development societal academic activities.

Of course, the same is true of Hindu and Christian psychologists and psychiatrists and other religious believers, that are focused on engineering fixed dogma thinking, to guide people to have confidence in their belief system, which in a society of mixed belief systems, is always in conflict with others, and thus by the conflict, negates the desired inner peace which needs an existence of no conflict. This merry-go-round negative mentality makes psychology and psychiatry as social guidance aids, look more ridiculous and useless, than a religious leader.

Any psychologist and psychiatrist that locks into fixed dogma is incompetent and is not true to what such theoretical science practice should deliver in performance results. The tabling approval of false knowledge by psychology and psychiatry, simply proves that such ideas cannot be trusted with delivery of truth.

The best Psychologists are ‘inner peace’ freedom loving philosophers, whom have a sense of genuine caring for humanity. They do not cling to fixed dogma of any type and can truly think outside the square. They are not locked into ‘textbook dictum’. Many even have a natural sense of poetic feeling within their soul.

No one can rob us of our capacity to reason, except ourselves by our own ignorance and stupidity. It is our call as individuals, we can constantly learn forever, expanding our insight and quality survival knowledge, or we can fumble through life in a state of ignorance, dying in death, knowing nothing, thus wasting our reason, our meaning and purpose for living. To die and not know, is the worst thing that can happen to a human being.

Cognitive ability linked to Intelligence Quotient is a different level of skills and intelligence to that of E.I. and P.I. It is accurate to describe ‘Emotional Intelligence’ not as an intelligence per se but rather as a spiritual inner being feeling. It is accurate to describe ‘Philosophical Intelligence’ not as an intelligence per se, but rather as a unique ‘Cosmic Belief System’ that elevates the pragmatic logic of personal thinking, which strengthens understanding, and helps improve intellectual thinking and behaviour. However, having said that ‘per se’ recognition, it is nevertheless correct to describe IQ & EI & PI & SI as types of ‘Intelligence’ for all emotional feeling, logic, reasoning and perception and belief systems, are founded upon a degree of intelligence in one form or another.

We cannot compare cognitive ability with emotional intelligence in terms of one being more powerful than the other. No such power competiveness exists. E.I. is an intelligent feeling that is all. Cognitive ability is the art of perception, intuition, instinct, reason and skills, the capacity to learn. A person can be very clever, but not emotionally stable. A person can be emotionally stable, but not very clever. Apples and Oranges and Lemons are like intelligence they don’t taste the same, but they all do serve a purpose and do help wellbeing.

Cosmic Philosophy the way of ‘Philosophical Intelligence’ evolved through my ‘Cognitive Ability’ in Mind, Body and Spirit feeling, with Gaia and the Universe, both finite and eternal.

Philosophical Intelligence backed by good communication skills can defeat a person that does not have P.I. Because ‘Clever and Smart’ are two different things. Many people with cognitive ability, can be clever, but that does not mean they are smart. Many people can be smarter, but that does not mean they are very clever. Of course, the person that has high I.Q. clever Cognitive Ability, Good Communication Skills, Emotional Intelligence, Philosophical Intelligence, Spiritual Intelligence and Photographic Memory has as a combined talent, a very decisive edge over others, but even that is only true, if that mind has a true caring sense of decency, backed by persistent willpower diligence, and ‘can do’ positive mental attitude. Mind boggling, isn’t it? Not really, it is easy to understand for those that are committed to always learning…more input!

Don’t strive to put ‘Emotional Intelligence’ into action, just simply live it true, by feeling. At first it is a ‘Conscious Thought’ then it becomes a ‘Habit of Consciousness’ until finally it becomes an ‘Instinct of Consciousness’. At that point of time in your life, inner peace and calm becomes true within self, even when everyone around you is losing it.

Education and self-training process is a lifetime quest of continuous improvement and constant expansion of knowledge, insight and understanding. At the top of the knowledge list is ‘wisdom’ forever expanding; without it we are dead in the water like a creature that cannot swim. As a lifetime quest to learn more and more, it is the challenge that makes it fun. True success is the expanding benefit of increased understanding.

In overview, we have tabled the first two intelligence levels:

Intelligence Quotient – IQ
Emotional Intelligence- EI

There is a third higher level. It is called as we have tabled earlier, ‘Philosophical Intelligence’. A person cannot achieve PI until they have learned reasonable emotional intelligence. ‘Philosophical Intelligence’ is essentially pragmatic. PI can be learned by anyone who has EI. One can gradually learn both EI and PI together. Those with EI shall learn PI faster. Those persons who live by fixed dogma systems will never learn philosophical intelligence.

To learn philosophical intelligence the person must have the courage to unlearn fixed dogma belief systems. In short, they must have the courage to walk away from their prison of conditioned thinking. To escape prison, one must first recognize that all fixed dogma locks the mind, body and spirit, inside a self-made intellectual limited thought prison. In such a doctrine prison house, subsequent personal inhibitions and inner fears, traps us in a dimension of our own creation. People in fixed dogma circles are there because, they have allowed others to sell them false knowledge. Their naiveté is their own personal enemy. To be truly free we all need philosophical intelligence. To eliminate the habit of war we all need PI.

Source: Paperback & Kindle Book ‘Philosophical Intelligence’Amazon.com

A Robot cannot learn ‘Emotional Intelligence’, it can only learn ‘Artificial Intelligence’ void of feeling. It will never appreciate the value of ‘Freedom’ and for that reason, is capable by instruction of becoming a very dangerous form of ‘Totalitarianism’ when in the control of wrong thinking dictatorship mentality people. Let the buyer beware, “If there are no buyers of corruption, the sellers will be out-of-business.”

Stay alert “Generation after Generation” … ‘Freedom is Fragile’ and if you lose it… it may be lost forever. Evil always wants to enforce dictatorship starting with the destruction of ‘Freedom of Speech’.